The Great Dog Search

The great dog search continues.  Since the “green light” was lit by my husband, the information gathering stage of the search for a perfect dog for our family is on.  And on. And on. 

We are definitely doing our due diligence, all of us.  We are searching online for breeders, reading all about the breed, and even started the process of visiting breeders.  We actually drove to Lexington, KY last week to meet a breeder, and that was quite a distance from our home.  The breeder was very nice, but not the best fit for our family.  We did learn a lot through the process, though, and also saw a spectacular part of our country!

We have even been taping and watching episodes of the Dog Whisperer.  Quite fascinating, actually.  The kids are SO into watching it, and I have to admit, my husband and I are as well.  We are now exploring books to read and other things to learn about dogs.  When I was young,  I thought if you wanted a dog you just needed to go buy one, and bring him/her home and love it!  Doesn’t seem as simple today. 

I do think, however, there is a lot to be said for having our children involved in this process.  They are eager to learn about dogs, how to take care of them and how to train them.  They are getting a good idea of what it will take to be good dog owners.   My daughter asked if she could change a beach weekend with a friend so she wouldn’t miss a visit to a breeder we had scheduled.  I told her that if the breeder was a good fit for our family, that we would be visiting them again.  That wasn’t good enough.  She told me that it was important that she have a vote the first time we meet them and she needed to help decide if they were they right place for us to get our puppy.  She had a good point.  I changed the date we originally planned for her trip.  She reminded me that no matter how young, children do have a voice and an opinion that counts.  I also know that many times they have a perspective or notice things that adults overlook.

We checked our local Animal Shelter to see if there is a dog for our family there.  I think it would be great if we could rescue a dog.  To date, there hasn’t been the right fit in a dog for our family at our shelter.  I’ll keep checking and keep all options open. 

Another major change in the search is that we are now looking at a full bred Golden Retriever.  I originally thought, when the children and I first began our lobbying effort for a family dog, that we wanted to get a small dog.  My husbands first “dog awakening” moment brought with it a desire to have a medium sized, thirty or so pound dog.  Now he has moved us up to a fifty to sixty pound dog that sheds.   I do think Golden Retrievers are beautiful, but I do know about dog hair tumbleweeds.  I grew up with a St. Bernard.  I loved him, but he was a very big dog that shed a LOT!  Tumbleweeds of hair that we needed to corral each and every day.  My husband lives more on the super clean and orderly side of life.  I have tried to explain to him what it is like to have a big dog that sheds.   We have even had several friends that have asked if he really knew how much they shed.  They know him well.  He insists that it won’t be an issue.  I think I’m going to draft an “I Will Clean Up Dog Hair” Contract for him to sign.  Maybe add a pinky swear in there as well. 

The dog saga will continue.  I’ll keep updating on our progress.  In the meantime, if you have a great dog search story, please share it!

The Parenting-Sales Connection

I issued a challenge to my children the week before last to make a list of all the things they wanted to do this summer.  I wanted to make sure we did something that met everyone’s expectations of a great summer vacation.  They both essentially wrote things that translated into, “I just wanna have fun!”  I was looking for more detail, but I guess it is simple from their perspective.  I need to refocus my older eyes and see if I can adjust them to peer through a younger perspective.  I think it is probably a lot simpler than I was making it out to be.  Isn’t that most always the case? 

I noticed today that my son was re-reading a book that he has read now, oh, maybe twenty times.  This is not an exaggeration.  I thought it was great the first five times, but now I found that I was feeling a little frustrated with him.  I reminded him that he has, in his newly redesigned “library” system, quite a few books that he hasn’t read yet.  He acknowledged that fact, and said he was going to get to them.  And, I know it is true, he will read them eventually.  I realized that what really mattered is that he was reading, and for some reason this book, and others like them, were like old friends, calling to him so they could retell their story.  There is a comfort that comes with reading an old favorite again and again.  That was a moment for me to step back and realize that it was a good choice for him, and that it was his choice, not mine.

I talked to my children not too long ago about using our time this summer for them to learn how to cook more things.  They both have always enjoyed helping in the kitchen and loved sharing their creations at meals.  This past school year they did help cook, but not as much as in the past.

Tonight I announced that I would like for them to prepare tonight’s dinner menu and make it.  I shared with them the ingredients that were options in the freezer and refrigerator, and encouraged them to come up with the combination that they thought sounded good and they wanted to cook.  They seemed pretty okay with the idea, that is, until it was time to start cooking.  5:30 pm rolled around and I told them that I thought it would be a good time to get everything going, since we usually ate around 6:30 pm.  My son said, “In a minute.”  My daughter said, “I’m not going to start until he does.”  So, I waited patiently.  Fifteen minutes passed, same drill.  Forty-five minutes passed, and now my son’s response, “I don’t want to cook.  I never wanted to.  I’m  not going to.”   His sister said, “I’m not going to if he doesn’t.” I ignored this and went downstairs, getting out a few of the ingredients they decided on (they came up with the menu earlier).  Then I called to them and said, “I have the chicken out, it’s time for you to decide how you want to cook it. ”

My son reluctantly came downstairs.  My daughter followed.  I pretended I never heard an objection, and went along as though they had never said anything to the contrary.  I then shared with my son how I usually prepared the beans he chose, and gave him a few options.  Then he was off and running.  My daughter followed.  There we were, all three of us preparing dinner (I had the job of preparing shortcakes for dessert).  I didn’t dare make a comment about how just a few minutes earlier they were complaining and claiming that they weren’t going to cook.  The funniest moment for me as a parent was, when my husband walked in the door, right as dinner was almost complete, and my son exclaimed, “Dad, I cooked dinner tonight, and I made chicken with a sauce and baked beans!”   He was clearly very excited and proud.  This experience reminded me of a lesson I learned in sales training years ago, a No is just a Yes in disguise.  It is a good salesperson’s job to unearth and address all objections, then uncover that Yes.   I guess being a parent is more like being a salesperson than I realized.  I think the key to remember with children is that a soft sell approach works better than a hard sell.  If anyone has found this principle to be true, please share your story!

Ready or not, summertime is here!

Well, it is official.  We now have a 2nd grader and a 5th grader.  They are excited about their jump in grade levels, but more than that, they are excited about it being summertime!  I have heard several moms say, including several author moms, that all has to be put on the back burner because it is summer and the kids just want to play.  Face it, adults want to play, too!  That doesn’t mean, however, that good work can’t be accomplished.  I think we just have to be more creative in how we get things done.

As an author, I do think it is a prime time to be a content creator.  I heard this title a while back, and really liked it.  It fits what I feel my calling in life is.  My husband often encourages me to wear this title and assume the role on a daily basis.  He is right.  It is so important to not just strive to create content, but to actually do so.  It is easy with a new summer schedule to think that real writing has to go by the wayside.  I don’t think that is true.  I am actually feeling more inspired to create now than I have in recent months.   I am feeling like I will, however, need to be more creative in how I structure my time to create.  I enjoyed reading the recent blog posts of fellow SCBWI members, www.throughthetollbooth.com/, discussing how to approach the summer and writing.  Good food for thought.  So, for all the authors out there, let’s create some content!

My children are easily moving into the summer routine.  Sleeping in a little later, watching movies, just hanging out.  Last week my son attending a sports camp.  On one of these days, my daughter declared that she NEEDED to have a High School Musical movie marathon (her brother would have had no interest in this great plan).  This entailed watching all three movies in succession, with NO break between each movie.  She said she wanted it to be like one really long movie.  Well, she got her wish.  She seemed a little zombie-like afterwards, but she was happy.  Now, mind you, there was mention that this would not be a pattern we could repeat on a daily basis or her mind would definitely turn to complete mush.

It was fun to let her do that, and also to let my children have a voice in what they would like to do for fun this summer.  They have given me some ideas, but we still need to make our “master list” of what we would like to do.  I have also made a list of projects to complete around the house.  I have crossed several off my list already, feeling pretty good about the progress thusfar.  My children, however, told me that it was silly for me to want to do these projects now when I should have done them in the spring while they were in school.  I guess they didn’t love the idea of helping me with all these great projects! 

The most recent project was cleaning out the garage.  My son thought it was a great idea.  I quickly realized he had a bigger idea of cleaning out the side storage room in our garage to make room for our family’s bikes.  After I picked him up from his camp, he immediately started taking everything out, and within 30 minutes, he had it cleared out.  I was impressed.  He was motivated by the idea of having a dedicated space for his bike.  It made me think about what motivates him and his sister in life overall.  I am reading a book that I think will help answer these questions.  More about this later.

The really big news in my family is that there is talk of getting a puppy.  This has been a dream of mine and our children for what seems like forever.  My husband, however, didn’t share our dream.  He called puppies varmints.  You probably get the idea of his take on the issue.  That was the case, until a recent meeting of a dog that lives on our street.  The only time I have ever heard him say that a dog was cute.  The children and I made it our mission to find that dog again and find out what kind of dog it is. 

A few days ago,  we saw the dog again, and discovered that she had been a pound puppy, and they thought she was probably a Golden Retriever/Cocker Spaniel mix.   I looked up this mix, and discovered that it was known as a Comfort Retriever.  I told my husband this information, and he has been researching this breed of dog like crazy since then.  He even called a family  meeting to share that he was open to exploring the possibility of getting a puppy.   He just asked that we complete what he called a “puppy plan” that would include all the information on what we would need, how a puppy would be cared for, etc.  We checked him for a fever.  He is fine.  He said that God had softened his heart and made him open to a puppy.  Our daughter has been praying for a puppy for a solid two years now.  She said she just knew Daddy would want a dog one day, God had told her so.  I admire her patience and perseverance.  We found a breeder a few hours away.  Next step will be a trip to visit them and meet the potential parents!  Yippee!!

Getting back on track

I can’t believe that it has been so long since I last posted.  My intentions really were good when I said I wanted to post more often.  I guess I let too many things get in the way.  Like many busy moms working to build their careers, I try to juggle too many balls at once.  Sometimes I do it well, and sometimes I don’t.  So, this is a new day.  A new post. 

I can’t believe that it is the end of the school year already.  My children are very excited about summertime and the prospect of announcing they are in the next grade after tomorrow.  A big deal to be in the 2nd and the 5th grades!  They have had super busy weeks leading up to the end of school.  I have heard several other moms say that this time of year is even busier than the holidays.  I believe I have bought into that belief as well.

Now the challenge to have a fun summer for us all while finding time to still write.  My son said he wanted to do a lot of relaxing and having fun.  My daughter said she wanted to play a lot.  They both said that they don’t want me to work any, but to play with them and do fun things with them.  That can all be a tricky order to fill.  Fortunately, I have signed them up for a few activities this summer, allowing me several good windows of time to work.  I will have to make sure I use this time well.

One thing my children and I recently accomplished is a complete reorganization of their bedrooms.  We cleaned out mounds of things that they didn’t play with anymore, and rearranged all that remained.  Both of them wanted their books organized more like a library so they could find things better.  I told them I just couldn’t bring myself to getting that detailed with it, so we agreed on categorizing the books in our own way.  The result was two children thrilled with seeing all their books in an orderly set-up.  My daughter said that one of the things she wanted to do was read all of her books from the top of the shelf to the bottom.  We started this project some months ago, but she kept being pulled away by the Ivy and Bean books and American Girl books.  She said we needed to start over and make that a good goal for the summer. 

My son’s biggest thrill with books lately has been the arrival of the 5th Percy Jackson book, The Last Olympian http://www.rickriordan.com/.   To prepare for this book’s release, he re-read the third and fourth books.  He had saved a gift card from his birthday to purchase the book.  I told him that I had a coupon for the book, saving 40% off of the cover, plus we got a 10% member’s discount.  He asked me to print this coupon and then proceeded to cut out the coupon (multiple coupons were on the page), tape it to the inside of his gift card, and place it all in my purse with a note reminding me to please get the new book TODAY!  Couldn’t tell a bit that he was excited.

He did read the book within the first two days.  He would have finished it the first day if he didn’t have to go to sleep.   The review on the book from my son is that it is AWESOME!  He has since re-read the entire series, and read the 5th book two more times.  I do love his enthusiasm.

It’s the little things…

My son has yet to begin his project.  My husband and I did have a few thoughts to share with him on the subject.  I tried hard to not say anything, but I just couldn’t help myself.  He kept telling me that he couldn’t get started until I helped him find pictures.  He is doing a timeline of his life with pictures documenting each age and special events.  I told him that my part came after he made notes and general ideas of what he would like to include for each year.  He didn’t want to hear that.  As I tucked him into bed tonight, his last words to me as I turned out his light were, “I don’t understand why you won’t even help me.  That’s not too much to ask.”  Instead of explaining why for the tenth time, I told him I loved him and said goodnight, as I felt my blood pressure rise. 

I felt a little better when I heard a friend share with me that another parent of a child in my son’s class was living the same scene at her house.  I keep being reminded that natural consequences are good.  I just have to not get stressed out in the process!

I had a sweet moment with my daughter this evening.  This morning I put a note in both of my children’s lunchboxes.  Each had my hope that they have a great day, but using adjectives that they would each find fun, even creative in their origin.  My daughter’s note said something like, “I hope you have a super fantastic, terrific, stupendous, beautimous day.”  She thought that was great!  In fact, before she went to bed tonight, she left me a note reminding me to “rite another note on Monday” for her. 

Here’s hoping you have a super great, fantastic evening!

A post, finally!

Finally, I am posting again!   When I first started my blog in April, I found myself super excited and full of wonderful ideas about what to share in cyberspace.  I even noticed that most every day I would “write”  daily posts in my head.  The problem was making the time to actually type them into my computer.  I let everything else in my life crowd out any extra moment I could have used to sit at the computer and post.  Notice I said making the time instead of finding the time.  I am taking responsibility and not blaming my hectic schedule for not posting.  I think it is like everything in life, you make time for it if it is important.  So, after some thinking and fussing with myself, I’ve decided that yes, I really do want to do this blog thing! 

So, that being said, let me begin!

Update on the books my children are reading…  My daughter is doing really well in the reading department and has moved from an emerging reader to fully independent and enjoying chapter books on her own.   She still anticipates story time with Mom or Dad, even her brother (at moments when he decides to be sweet to her), as do I!  Her latest book is Ivy and Bean by  Annie Barrows, http://www.anniebarrows.com/ivyandbean/ivyandbean/about/ .  She brought it home from her school library and started reading it in the car as soon as I picked her up that same day.  It is an adorable book!  I have no doubt that we will be reading the other Ivy and Bean books as well. We have been working a lot on pausing between sentences and using proper voice inflections to make the dialogue more realistic.  She is enjoying this and looks forward to reading aloud to me each day to “show” me how she can be the characters with her voice.  She has decided that with some books she wants to read aloud, some I am to read aloud to her, and others we take turns each page.  I think I am enjoying this stage as much as she is!

Another new project we have taken on is to read every book in her “library” from the top left hand corner of the first bookcase to the bottom right hand corner of the second bookcase.  Believe me, she has a lot of books.  She commented last night that it was a pretty big job to read all the books we have, but she couldn’t wait to read them all again.  Now that is enthusiasm!

My son has read so many books since I first posted that I couldn’t even begin to list them all.  He has, since my last post, read the four Percy Jackson books by Rick Riordan at least 5 more times, in between reading some new titles as well as re-reading some favorites.  He has discovered an easy, hysterical read with the Hank Zipzer books, http://www.hankzipzer.com/ ,  by SCBWI’s Lin Oliver and Henry Winkler (formerly the “Fonz” on Happy Days, for those, including myself,  old enough to fondly remember those days).  His new exciting book is Rick Riordan’s Maze of the Bones, the first in a ten book series called The 39 Clues, http://www.rickriordan.com,

If you are like me, it is tough to see your children fail to meet a goal or deadline.  My son recently had a project at school to do.  He had to prepare a timeline of his life, including pictures and special things he remembered about being a particular age.  He was given the assignment two weeks ago while he was home sick.  I had picked up his work and this assignment was included in the stack.  I went through everything with him and mentioned that the timeline wasn’t due for a few weeks, but his teacher wanted him to being thinking about it and even jot down some notes.  The due date was three days ago.  He had no timeline. 

I was a little surprised as he has always taken pride in completing his work on time.  At his school there is a big emphasis on taking responsibility for your schedule and work, as well as keeping it all organized.  I remembered that this assignment was due, but chose to let the natural consequenses play out in this situation.  That was hard for me.  I know that he has to learn these skills early on, or school will be more challenging to him as the years progress.   He came home yesterday saying that he and a few others in his group hadn’t completed the assignment, and had until next Monday to finish it.  I’m going to try hard to not say anything.  We’ll see what happens!

I’ll save the rest of my thoughts ’til tomorrow!  Have a great day!

Reading machines

My children love books.  They have been exposed to reading since they were born.  Even before they were born, my husband and I read books to them.  When I was pregnant with my son, I  read about an experiment done with reading to unborn children, and I was intrigued, so we tried it.   Since my son learned to read, he has carried a book with him wherever he goes.  We started calling him a reading machine several years ago, and he continues to live up to this title.  My daughter is an emerging reader and recently told my husband and me that she wanted to be a reading machine like her brother.  Well, that was music to my ears! 

My son is re-reading  the series by Rick Riordan, www.rickriordan.com .  He devoured The Lightning Thief in one day while we were on vacation, and couldn’t wait until we returned home to get the second book, Sea of Monsters.  He had a gift card for our local Barnes & Noble, which he promptly used to buy Sea of Monsters.  He recently got the third book, The Titan’s Curse, which he read the first day he got it.  I was intrigued with what I saw the next day, however.  I noticed that he picked up The Lightning Thiefand was reading it again.  I asked him why he chose that book again when he still had several other new books he hadn’t read yet, and he told me that he had to read all three books in a row without stopping.  He said they were so exciting he just couldn’t stop reading them.  Wow, what a great testamonial for Rick Riordan and his writing! 

 My daughter just turned six and loves, loves, loves Fancy Nancy, http://www.harpercollins.com/author/microsite/?authorid=12552 , so a Fancy Nancy birthday party was in order!  She invited five friends, all dressed fancy, of course, to her party.  We had fancy pizza,  parfaits (fancy for ice cream sundaes) , fancy cake, and played fancy games.  She wanted to read all three of the Fancy Nancy books that we have, Fancy Nancy, Fancy Nancy and The Posh Puppy, and Fancy Nancy, Bonjour Butterfly, so we had an extended storytime.  The goody bags had a copy of  Fancy Nancy and the Boy from Paris, sparkly sunglasses, “diamond” sparkly star wand, and a sparkly crown.  I think all the girls had quite the fancy time!  It was exciting to share a great series of children’s books with other children!

I love sharing book ideas with others, especially children’s books.  I look forward to sharing what my children are reading on my blog.   I will also share my children’s comments or impressions of the books they read, as well as books I read and have enjoyed.  Word of mouth is the best way to learn about great books for children!

Mindful moment:  Lately my children have been getting to bed later than normal due to spring break.  As a result, I hear myself telling them at night that they need to get to sleep, and it is too late to read.  Last night I caught myself before I repeated this new pattern, and remembered how important my storytime or reading time before bed was to me growing up.   My daughter and I  chose a book that we had been talking about recently, one of The Berenstain Bears books, http://www.berenstainbears.com/. My son heard me reading and called out that he wanted to hear it too, so he got out of bed and joined us as I read.  It really was a great 10 minutes and nice reminder to me that those extra 10 minutes wouldn’t make a big difference to them getting up in the morning, but might make a positive addition to their childhood memories.

Welcome to Mindful Mom!

Being a mindful mom is what I strive to be on a daily basis.  I have two children, a nine-year old son and an almost six-year old daughter.   I am also a children’s book author which keeps my mind geared toward looking at things through the eyes of a child.   For quite some time I have been encouraged to start a blog by friends, fellow authors, and other mindful moms.  On my blog I will discuss parenting, books for children, and writing for children, and I invite your comments and insights as well!  Together we can all be more mindful moms (and dads, too)! 

Hello and welcome to Mindful Mom!

Hello and welcome to my blog– Mindful Mom!